Tweenagers, inbetweeners and twenty somethings

Yay! I am back from the posting desert! I've been unable to find inspiration lately, maybe because all I do is talk about lighting, plumbing, painting, decorating, paying bills ugh, I feel old. Even though according to this blog I have been a pre-adolescent for the last three years. Great.

I have been mistaken for the last three years and no-one has been kind enough to tell me!
Actually that's not true, a few weeks ago a friend told me but I thought he was wrong and not me. I am never wrong. Except this once maybe.


Someone should have told me that a "tweenager" is not the equivalent of "teenager" to refer someone in their twenties (which actually makes some sense, doesn't it?).

Someone should have told me (sooner) that according to the Urban Dictionary a Tweenager is this:

My "favourite" no doubt is meaning number 2. 

So this blog has been displaying my ignorance for the last three years, and that means either:


1) people consider me rather stupid and therefore likely to say I am a tweenager myself, even if I double the age of a tweenager.

2) people think I really am a tweenager (maybe the only tweenager in the world who has a mortgage). Maybe they even think I dress like a little ***** because I like pop tarts (for a second I thought it referred to

(Yes, I chose this Darth Vader Pop Tarts on purpose)

and not the other "pop tarts"

(I had to dig in google images to find this, the rest were either fat Britney, shaved-head Britney, or I-am-kissing-Madonna Britney...). Or

3) people read my blog and think: "ya think that u are cool, but ya arent."

Either way I didn't like it, so I have declared myself a twenty-something instead and have thus changed the line that appears below the Blog title.

Soon enough I'll have to change it again, let's hope that this Blog is still active by then.


Thanks Jon.

Such is Life

Till EURIBOR do us part.

"I will" he said, and my head started spinning.

"He said yes?" I had to ask to make sure I was not dreaming. I still couldn't believe my fortune, my future hapiness depended greatly on those words, and he had accepted my proposal!!!

Tears of joy filled my eyes, I started calling friends and family to make the anouncement.

"When?" was the most common question.

"In approximately a month" was my reply.

"So soon? You will have very little time to make all the arrangements. All the paperwork it requires... Are you sure you will be ready by then?"

I hope so... And then the spiral phonecalls, emails, documents, more documents, numbers and more numbers started.

It's been a very short engagement, only three weeks approximately, and now I am more than happy to anounce to all of you that next Wednesday 21st of March 2012 I am marrying...

MY BANK.

Happy mortgage to me.

STAR BLOGS EPISODE I: The shame menace

Turmoil has engulfed the Galactic Republic. The taxation of trade routes to outlying origami systems is in dispute. 

Hoping to resolve the matter with a blockade of deadly battleships, the greedy Trade Federation has stopped all shipping to the small planet of Naboo. 

While the Congress (*ehem!*) of the Republic endlessly debates this alarming chain of events, the Supreme Chancellor has secretly dispatched two Jedi Knights, the guardians of peace and justice in the galaxy, to settle the conflict... 

I skipped a week of posting because it was the turn of the Phantom Menace and I wanted to post on the same week of its 3D relaunch.

I thought I would be super excited about it, but I am not! And I know the reason:

Who did this horrid thing? Horrid! I see this and instead of wanting to watch the movie on theatres I want to pop my eyes out of my face.

Come on, Star Wars already has kitsch posters, with a seventies look that made them somewhat nice, and all fans were used to them and kind of understood that tatty aura of B series movie that encircled the posters.

But the new poster? That is like glueing together bits and pieces giving no sense of what the film is about! Fortunately they have been at least king enough not to include Jar-jar Binks in the poster. So the new trilogy may not be the best trilogy ever, even though Episode III has some interesting stuff going on, but if the content is not good, at least the package should be inviting!


Fans have had to defend the Phantom Menace yet too often, sure it is not like the original trilogy, sure the story itself is somewhat lacking and childish, but it is Star Wars come on! Don't make it look like a Leslie Nielsen (RIP) movie! Please. I'll have to defend it is superawesome even if the poster says the contrary and I don't like that.

May the Force be with you.

Such is Life

STAR BLOGS EPISODE VI: The return of Lego (R)

Thanks to my sister I have discovered the prints that are going to cover the walls of (let's hope so) my future place.


And also I have discovered a great artist of small things, mostly Lego (R)!! Please check his website, because its totally cool: Mike Stimpson. 

He not only fotographs Star Wars stuff but also recreates famous photos and pictures with Lego (he even made a recreation of Goya's "Los fusilamientos del 2 de mayo" commissioned by the Spanish government) or Steve McCurry`s Afghan Girl.


Through his work I also rediscovered Stormtroopers, which may be one of the most world wide known Star Wars icons of all time but that may not have gotten the recognition they deserve.

Stormtroopers have been on both sides, and I am convinced that after the fall of the Empire they went back to the good graces of people, they may have even gotten married and have kids (it already happened during the Clone Wars, so hopefully they get the peace they deserve after more than 30 years fighting).

Little did I know at age 8, when I first saw Star Wars that over the years, I would want my walls filled with Stormtroopers, who for me were simple idiotic men who had enrolled in the Empire's troops in their fight against the Rebellion.

Bad nasty people these Stormtroopers hummmmm.

And now? Now thanks to the Clone Wars (you may object but it is an awesome show!) and these pictures I pity Stormtroopers so much I would like to adopt a squadron and invite them over for tea every week. Even more so if they cook! and knit, and eat pancakes.


So next time you wonder what do I get M as a present? please please please please get me one of these, any of these, all of them, but do it!!!

May the force be with you.

Such is Life

STAR BLOGS EPISODE V: The Calories strike fat

EPISODE V: The Calories strike fat

It is a dark time for the Diet. Although the Death Watermelon has been destroyed, Carbohidrate troops have driven the rebel froces from their hidden base and pursued them across the fridge.

Evading the dreaded Carbohidrate Dishes, a group of calory fighters led by Luke Spicewalker has established a new secret base on the remote icing world of Hoth .

The evil lord Darth Transfat, obsessed with finding young Spicewalker, has dispatched thousands of remote probes into the far reaches of the fridge...

 In the icing planet of Hoth, the Carbohidrate forces, push our favourite calory fighters out of their hiding and destroy the rebel base, forcing Princess Leia, Chewbacca and Ham Solo to flee on board the Millenium Salad Bowl in search of the diet republic's meeting point. Their journey won't be uneventful, constantly chased by enemy ships and on the verge of being eaten by gigantic fridge worms, our heroes escape to the so-thought friendly cloud city, where they are trapped and held hostage awaiting for Luke Spicewalker to come in his friends' rescue.

Luke, who has been training with old weightwatcher master Yolkda leaves his training unfinished and meets his fate in the confines of cloud city, only to learn Darth Transfat is...

you all know who he is!

May the Force be with you.

Such is Life.

Impotant note: None of this pictures are mine, all obtained from google images. All awesome, thanks to the cooks!

STAR BLOGS EPISODE IV: A new post

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away...

The creative team of whichever agency hired by Volks Wagen came up with a brilliant idea that has given me the inspiration to start a new blogging cycle:

STAR BLOGS! It sounds like I'm going to show you some awesome blogs, but I am not, I'm going to show you some STAR WARS goodness.

The title is bad, but I hope you find the idea cool.

Six movies, six episodes, obviously starting on episode IV because that is how it was done, I'll be posting in the next few weeks six posts on fun (and sometimes cute) STAR WARS stuff which I really like.

And today is the turn of the bark side: Volks Wagen's 2012 Super Bowl commercial. I almost cried with the AT-AT doggy (stolen idea from Ms. Mello and her dog Bones Mello - the AT-AT dog)

Brilliant.  And stressful, I have tried to identify all 11 doggies and there is one I just can't decide who it is: I'll start from left to right, we've got R2D2 and C3PO, Leia, Han Solo in the middle, and Luke, then tiny Yoda, Chewbacca, Wicked the ewok, Emperor Palpatine and Darth Vader, but who is the caramel brown dog suppossed to be?

I have two possible candidates:

- Ben Kenobi (I said Ben on purpose because I am that kind of nerd), because it's the only main (I would say essential) character that I cannot identify. And he has a brown cape.

- Admiral Ackbar. Because that dog really looks a lot like him.

Any ideas? And don't say Jabba the Hutt because we all know he would be a lot fatter.

So don't be a slimo and leave me some nice comments and suggestions.

May the Force be with you.

Such is Life

PS: Please check the video of the Wampug posted on Bones' Facebook page. I was going to post it here but I think we've had enough dogs for today.

I don't remember my life b.i (before iPad)

iPads are a dangerous thing... Yes they are. First thing people ask you when you drop the idea of buying one is: what do you need an iPad for?

And so, for a little while you wonder what use can you give to the device, and come up with nothing. N O T H I N G. Nothing. Crisis ensues, you don't need it, you can live a perfect happy life with it. You may even live better without it (I dread the day my iPad starts malfunctioning, and so should you). You get it anyways thinking: "I'll discover what to do with it when I have it, but it is so awesome I need it."

And hell you do.

So much, you can no longer live without it. Without your iPad...

1.- how are you supposed to watch TV while you shower? (essential)

2.- how do you cook?

3.- how can you look for a flat?

4.- how do you sketch and draw?

5.- how do you survive a bus ride?

6.- how do you know which movie was number one in the US box office the week you were born?

7.- how are you supposed to watch your favourite MTV shows?

8.- how are you supposed to (let's face it) save? (App store very dangerous)

9.- how are you supposed to watch a non-HD screen?

and last but not least

10.- how do you wish happy birthday to a friend? (also works for picking someone up at the airport)

One hundred apps downloaded in less than a month. I may have used about 30% of them, but in my mind... oh so essential.

Such is Life!